Movies I Paid To See In Theaters
Well, I did it. I sat down and made a list of bad movies I’ve seen in theaters. I shouldn’t call them bad, I guess I like a lot of them. They’re just a little embarassing is all. I left off terrible movies we all saw (like The Phantom Menace, The Mummy Returns, or the third Matrix).
I didn’t mean for the list to be this long, I just started and I kept remembering more. I’m sure I’ll think of another one right after I post.
I probably didn’t have to organize chronologically and link to Wikipedia, but I did.
An asterisk indicates that I saw the movie ironically. I’ve always liked bad movies at least as much as I like good ones.
I was born in February of 1982, so you can do the math and figure out how old I was when I saw these things. Take note of when I started seeing movies ironically.
1989
Police Academy 6: City Under Siege (one of my earliest movie-going memories. I spent the next two months renting the old Police Academies on VHS).
Career Opportunities (probably the worst title on this list)
1992
Mom and Dad Save the World
Super Mario Brothers: The Movie
Demolition Man (is this movie considered bad? I love it.)
Weekend at Bernie’s 2 (the movie was filmed at a Virgin Island resort my family had just stayed at, though I have to admit I’ve seen it on TV many times since)
Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit
Look Who’s Talking Now (the one with the dogs)
1994
Double Dragon (this movie made less than $3 million in America, which makes it the lowest grossing on this list. To put it in perspective, Weekend at Bernie’s 2 made $12.7 million)
City Slickers II (note: I’ve never seen City Slickers 1, except for the scene they always show at Yankee stadium)
Trapped in Paradise (holy shit is this movie awful. I had forgotten about it until I thought about Clean Slate)
1995
The Net
Tales From the Crypt presents: Demon Knight
To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything, Julie Newmar
Power Rangers: The Movie * (it’s odd that I would see that ironically at the same age I was really watching movies like Sudden Death)
1996
Bulletproof
Escape from LA (twice!)
Jingle All The Way (I’m Jewish, why did I see this?)
1997
Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie* (this was a reunion with my camp friends who I saw the first one with)
Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (everyone saw the first Mortal Kombat. This is the second one.)
The Sixth Man (took my younger cousins, but didn’t really want to see it. I think that’s important to note so you understand I really did want to see the rest of these movies.)
1998
Lost In Space
1999
The 13th Warrior (Of all the movies on the list, I hate this one the most)
Deep Blue Sea (I don’t hate this movie, but thought it was worth including on this list)
The Corruptor (wikipedia notes: “there is no major female role played in the film, and thus no love story to sidetrack from the film’s main story.”)
In college I had friends that worked at the movie theater, so I saw a lot of movies for free. It feels unfair to include them here. I did see Catwoman though, and even though it was free, it’s still worth mentioning.
2003
Spy Kids 3D (the first two Spy Kids are pretty good!)
2004
Club Dread (Twice! That’s how much I liked SuperTroopers)
2007
Norbit *
Honorable mention: I didn’t see it in theaters, but I rented The Jerky Boys Movie and Judge Dredd.
In conclusion, I appear to be responsible for every old-TV-show to movie adaptation made in the 90’s.
